It can’t be happening. Surely it can’t be happening.
I’m going to be forty in just under two months.
But it’s okay, nobody panic. As of this week I have a motto and a rudimentary plan.
Fuck it, I’m Forty.
The best old people I know say it like it is and do whatever the hell they want, because they know their time is finite. So I’ll consider forty the start of an extended training period for becoming forthright, bold and uncompromising.
My rudimentary plan:
Forty and Pain Free
Baby plus an office job plus writing every spare minute = fairly constant physical pain. It’s easy for me to not give priority to looking after my physical wellbeing, because there’s so much else to do. But I want to head into my forties on the path to being strong, flexible and energetic, instead of waking up feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. So I’m back on the yoga mat every day. It’s a challenge, but I LOVE IT. Already I feel so much better for it. I’m starting to feel like I can move again, and breathe again.
Just Finish It
I’m revising a MS that I wrote the first draft of in 2012. I’ve sat on it for years, partly because I wasn’t ready to look at it, partly because I didn’t have the confidence to push through and get it to a state where I could get feedback on it, partly because I kept getting distracted by shiny new projects. I’m going to finish it. I’m going to give it to readers and get feedback. I’m going to do a third, fourth, fifth and maybe sixth draft. Then I’m going to do SOMETHING with it. And then I’m going to repeat for the next story. And the next one. And the one after that. Writing fiction is my passion and vocation. I’m going to pursue it without fear.
Okay so this might seem a small thing, but having not much money I’ve been getting cheap and crappy haircuts and just leaving it to grow. And I realise, I don’t really feel like me! I have a wonderful hairdresser who I’ve known for years who does really great cuts, and I love having short hair. Given that I can’t afford new clothes, and I’ve put on a bit of weight, one of the best possible things I can do to give myself a lift in how I feel and how I’m able to present myself is getting a really excellent haircut. Which I did a few weeks ago. An early fortieth birthday present to myself!
This post was brought to you today by Merlot, dark chocolate, and comfy PJs.